As a Christian, spiritual warfare is something that we talk about, but not often think about... When I went to Mien camp the first time in 2002, that's when I first seriously experienced the power of spiritual war.  The troubles that these Mien nonchristian kids had to endure or experience in order to come to a Christian camp were countless... Family struggles and hinderance top the list.  Of course I thought it's only normal for campers to experience so much troubles because Satan wouldn't like it when people convert to Christianity. 

I've never thought it'd be the same in the Church ministry.  Maybe 'cause we've always been so comfortable with what we do with our groups.. Now, all of a sudden, there are 40+ non-christians/ seekers coming to church.  We have decided to help out this new group of student.  Since then, it seems like a lot of things have been going wrong..  At first, our internet wouldn't hook up right.. i got into a car accident.. then our computers, both laptop and desktop, and printer had problems and showed errors.  I felt a bit frustrated in the midst of this.. Also, for the first time, it took me more than 40mins to drive to church where a normal drive would be less than 10mins..which made me late for leading worship w/ the group.  Just last night, the DirectTV tech was 2hours late and worked on the hook up for more than 4hours, which made Albert late for fellowship, and I missed the entire program.  The tech thought it would be an easy hook up and fast, but afterall, it wasn't the case.  You may think that all of this is just coincidence.. which I've thought so too.  However, I can't help but start thinking that I really need to pray more about this.  Just like any mission trip, there is a big harvest here at church.  Why would Satan let them go?     

I was just flipping through the USD Magazine that came through the mail, and I came across the name, Myrna Stoflet, under "In Memoriam."  Under it, it read: She was a science and math teacher in the San Francisco Unified School District...

I know who she is!  She taught me Advanced Algebra in high school!  Many students disliked her because of her strict teaching style.  She'd even yelled at you if you crossed her.  I liked her though, 'cause I thought a lot of those students needed to learn the meaning of respect. 

Just remembering the old days... 

Other than being the soccer mom for the day, I actually went to a middle school friend's wedding that night.  Saw a lot of familiar faces from middle school and high school, which brought back memories.

I saw M.  We've known each other since middle school.  We've never been close, especially after she started dating A.  I've always felt like I didn't do anything wrong.  I've always treated A as a close brother, someone you can always talk to, but not in a romantic sense.  She probably felt otherwise though.  I even heard that she thought we dated after they broke up in college, which was not true.  The truth was when A wanted to start a dating relationship with me, I turned and ran away.  I haven't talked to him since.

My explanation could only be my excuses.  I've caused her a lot of pain over the year without thinking that I was responsible.  Even if we would have gone back in time, I wouldn't have known what to do differently.  Afterall, we were hormone driven teenagers.  At the wedding, we chatted a little bit, but it was awkward.

M reminds me of Jason.  No matter how others feel, Jason was hurt.  No matter how valid others' explanation were, someone got hurt.  Maybe I'm guilty of not being sensitive (again?!).  On a brighter note, God is powerful.  He is able to heal broken heart, and He is able to show us how to love those who's caused us pain.

During devotion, I was reading Matthew 18.  I've thought of people who've hurt my deepest feeling, and how I've reacted to them in the past.  The lesson of forgiveness is hard, but it's a demand from God.  Let's all learn how to practice forgiveness together. 

Matthew 18

 21Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?"

 22Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.^[f]

 23"Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. 24As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand talents^[g] was brought to him. 25Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt.

 26"The servant fell on his knees before him. 'Be patient with me,' he begged, 'and I will pay back everything.' 27The servant's master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go.

 28"But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii.^[h] He grabbed him and began to choke him. 'Pay back what you owe me!' he demanded.

 29"His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, 'Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.'

 30"But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. 31When the other servants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed and went and told their master everything that had happened.

 32"Then the master called the servant in. 'You wicked servant,' he said, 'I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. 33Shouldn't you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?' 34In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed.

 35"This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart."